The Dos and Don'ts of Networking: How to Make Connections That Count

What’s your reaction when someone suggests you "network"? For many, an overwhelming dread is associated with this term - some out of fear of the unknown, and some because of having to ask others for help. Networking seems so common-place, and yet most are at a loss for how to network, or how to network well.

Gary Frey knows a thing or two about networking. He has held impressive roles within large and small companies, including founding a brand consultancy firm, serving as Chief Impact Officer at a private equity/wealth planning firm, President of Bizjournals.com, and Senior Vice President at Bank of America.

But while his resume is extensive, it is anything but linear. Amidst much career success, Gary experienced great loss and hardship, from discovering his partner’s embezzlement to losing the bulk of his net worth in a private equity firm. Gary has had to persevere and redirect his career path, with all its unexpected twists and turns. He is where he is today because of what he calls “connecting,” as opposed to networking.

In 2015, while living in Ohio with no job on the horizon, Gary and his wife started planning next steps. Why not look for a job in Charlotte, NC, where they desired to live? So, Gary traveled to Charlotte, not necessarily to “network,” but in his mind, to reconnect with friends—and hopefully build new relationships. Gary began by asking friends to help him “make some meaningful connections.”

During his two weeks in Charlotte, he ended up having 30 meetings. As impressive as that was, Gary ended up revisiting Charlotte for two more two-week stints, and set up another 60 meetings. On his last day of the third trip, he received a job offer. Here are his practical networking/connecting pointers:

  • Expand your network. As extensive as your personal network may be, it is never big enough.

  • You need to connect with other connectors, so list personal contacts who know you, and who could potentially connect you to others. Gary initially contacted 20 people in Charlotte, and from there he was able to connect to others he didn’t know, who in turn connected him to still others, to generate 90 meetings in a six-week span. If you lack your own network, ask a trusted friend who does have a network to help.

  • Update your LinkedIn profile with your most relevant work experience and a current, really good profile picture. Often, people you meet will first check out your LinkedIn profile—to get a gist of your background and to see what you look like.

  • Email your personal contacts. Keep it brief and to the point. Mention your interests/strengths and thoughts on what you see yourself pursuing, so your contact will have to think outside any box that he/she may have put you in. Like this—

    • “As you know, I have been <insert positions held most recently> and am looking for the next thing. Here are a few things I’m looking for… Also, here is my LinkedIn profile <insert link> if you or someone else would like to know more about my experience.”

  • Follow up with a phone call if a week or two passes without hearing from your contacts. If need be, leave a message asking to get together for coffee/lunch/drinks. Ask for 30 minutes of their time.

  • Make it easy on those you are meeting. Go to them. Pay for their coffee/breakfast/lunch.

  • Don’t let yourself be pigeonholed. If you see people limiting their search for you, based on your previous work experience or the job they last knew you had, it is up to you to reshape the conversation. Share your vision for what you are thinking career-wise, as well as your strengths. For Gary, it had been 10+ years since he had been in Charlotte, and his contacts knew him as a marketing guru. They didn’t know of his broader experience, working with high-net-worth clients. He shared his vision to reshape the conversation.

  • Know your audience. Every city is different. Is your city a breakfast city? Do people wear a suit and tie? It is always better to err on the side of caution and be over-dressed, rather than too casual. Business casual is a safe bet.

  • Never miss an opportunity, even a doubtful one. When a friend/contact suggests you meet with one of their contacts, always do so, even if you don’t think it will serve you. You never know what will come of it! Gary was hesitant to meet with a few contacts along the way, but one of those uncertain contacts eventually led to a job offer.

  • Personal introductions to new contacts are worth their weight in gold. One of Gary’s personal contacts suggested he meet with one of their contacts, so Gary asked if they’d be willing to make an introduction on his behalf (call or email). Gary also offered to send his contact an email outlining what he was looking for along with his LinkedIn profile link, so his contact could forward this email directly.

  • State your “ask” early in the conversation. Don’t directly ask for a job, but rather share your interest, work history, passions, and strengths. Make it clear why you’re there and don’t beat around the bush. When it feels right, say something like, “As you get to know me, does anything resonate? Do you know of anybody I should know? If so, will you connect me?” Also, be sure to ask, “Is there anything I can do for you?”

  • Treat everyone you meet with respect. They are doing you a favor by sharing their time and resources. Be curious about their own career path and ask good questions.

  • Think about other ways to expand your network. Find networking events in your city. Consider your passions and hobbies—are there networks or organizations you could get involved in? These are good places to build more relationships.

  • If you plan to move to a new city, make clear you have real plans. People are wary of job applicants who say they’ll move, but offer no specifics.

By following these pointers, you can master the art of connecting, build meaningful relationships and get one step closer to achieving your goals. So, don’t be afraid to reach out and network - you never know what opportunities may arise.

 
For more advice on building your network, reach out to ProjectYou. Find out how our career coaching can help you find and advance in a career you love. Our assessments, 1:1 career advising, consultation, and professional resume and LinkedIn reviews can take your career to the next level.
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